On the Line
by Miss Mila
Summary: As a cop, she had a lot of things on the line. But how many things were one too many? Another Goren/Eames fic. Please read and review, in my opinion it's among my better ones. I'd like to here what you have to say! Review!


**Disclaimer:** I don't own any of the Law and Order: Criminal Intent characters, places, themes, etc. No copyright infringement intended.

**Author's Note: **So, it's me again with another LOCI fic. I know, I know, I'm obsessed. Anyway, this fic doesn't really take place at a specific time. But I have to say, it's one I like better than others. It's a Goren/Eames fic, but the beginning is more Eames centric. Give it a shot, and tell me what you think!

* * *

As a cop she had to put a lot of things on the line.

Her life was on the line half the time. Then again, she put away _killers _for a living. That was expected. Dealing with criminals wasn't always that safe. She knew that, and accepted it.

During some cases she had to put her badge on the line. Knowing that if she didn't there would be no way to solve the case. But if she did then she risked being suspended. And she didn't know what she would do if that happened.

Sometimes her job was on the line. Like during those cases when she was pressured to give the case everything she had, to do whatever she had to do, even things that the Chief may not approve of.

So, with all these things _already _on the line, she didn't want to put _more _on the line. Like her heart. It was the only thing she kept protected. It'd been hurt before, after all.

Y'know, before she was a cop, when those _other _things _weren't _on the line, her heart was out there. That's how she met Joe. Then _he _had her heart, and it was safe there, with him. But when he went and got himself shot, when he _died, _her heart didn't break. It shattered. And se was left on the ground, picking up those pieces with trembling fingers. It took her a while to put it back together, but she eventually did. And then she hid her heart away, protected it, because it was all she had left.

She was broken. And she'd tried to fix everything, she really tried, but she couldn't. Not completely. Not by herself.

* * *

"Captain, I won't make it to work today." She managed to call in.

"_Is everything alright?" _

"Everything is…fine. I'm just not feeling that well."

"_Okay." _He seemed hurried. _"Can you call Goren? I'm about to step into a conference." _

"Umm…sure." She said, hesitating. _Damn. _Goren would see right through her.

"_Alright, I'll see you tomorrow." _

"Bye."

Eames sighed. She _really _did not want to call Goren. _Technically _she didn't _have _to…but then Ross would have her head.

"_Hello?" _

"Bobby."

"_Eames." _Realization. _"You already called Ross, didn't you." _

No answer.

"_Of course you did. Otherwise you wouldn't be calling me." _

She sighed. "Yeah."

"_Are you alright?" _

Silence.

"_Do you want me to come over?" _

She nodded and a tear ran down her cheek. Then she realized that he couldn't see her over the phone. "Would you?"

"_Of course. I'll leave a message for Ross and be over in 10." _

Ross, not suspecting anything, agreed.

* * *

He let himself in; he had a key. Her apartment wasn't anything special to her; she'd given him the key a few years into their partnership. 'In case of emergencies.' she'd said.

He let himself in and found her, a solemn look on her face, flowers in her arms. She was on the verge of tears, but she held them in.

He put a comforting hand on the small of her back, and it took all she had to not break down right there.

They sat in the SUV; he was driving. The silence was comfortable, though a slight sadness hung in the air.

They reached the cemetery somewhere around 7. He stood back as she made her way to the familiar headstone.

She laid the flowers down and squatted in the grass.

He overheard her talking.

"Hey." She whispered, voice wavering. She sat down and hugged her knees to her chest. "I still miss you. But everyday gets a tiny bit easier. Y'know, I don't think I'll ever get over you leaving. You left too early. I know I always say that, but it's true. Sometimes I go through the hypotheticals…but that doesn't get me anywhere. You broke my heart, Joe." She sighed and stood. "I'm still not over _that._" She ran her fingers over the top of the stone. It read "Joseph Steven Dutton".

She blindly turned to Goren, the tears were already falling down her face. And he was there, his strong arms already around her. She held on to him and buried her head in his chest.

"I miss him. It's been 8 years since today and I still miss him."

"I know, Alex. It's because you loved him. _Love _him."

She sniffed and pressed closer to him. "Thanks, you."

"No problem."

"I just want to go back home." She whispered.

"Come on."

* * *

They made it back to her apartment and he helped her out of her coat. Underneath she was wearing one of Joe's old t-shirts. She only wore them when she was really upset.

She made her way to the couch without turning to see if he was following. He did follow. But first he went to the freezer and found a tub of Chocolate Chip ice cream and two spoons.

He came back and sat close to her, holding out the ice cream.

She gave a watery chuckle and took one of the spoons. He motioned her closer to him and she gladly obliged. Tucking her legs underneath her, she curled into his side, gladly digging into the ice cream.

"You know, a bottle of bourbon would've worked just as well." She said between spoonfuls.

"I've seen you drunk, Alex. Ice cream is the better alternative." He answered immediately.

What went on between them, it was so easy so natural. Nothing was ever awkward or uncomfortable. It was just _them, _and that was all that mattered.

Every now and then a stray tear would make it's way down her face, and he'd just hug her closer, hold her tighter.

"There are a lot of lines." She said as she looked up at the ceiling, changing her position to lay by his side.

Goren was confused by this, but he let her talk it out.

"In life, I mean. Some you can cross…some you can't. But I'm not interested in those lines at the moment." She explained, looking up at him.

He nodded, encouraging her to continue. "Yeah?"

"I'm talking about THE line."

"_The _line?"

"A lot of things get put on the line."

Goren smiled. She was starting to make sense. "_That _line."

She nodded.

"What have you put on the line?" He asked, taking the spoon from her and putting it on the table.

She turned until she was facing him, "A lot of things."

"Oh?"

"My life, in this job."

He nodded, his was on the line right along with hers.

"My badge, sometimes."

Oh yeah, he was familiar with that one.

"My job."

And that one.

She hesitated for a fraction of a second.

"What else?"

She looked down and away, almost ashamed. "My heart." She said in a light whisper. "That's been on the line, too."

"And what do you think about that?"

"I think life needs less lines." She said with a shrug.

"Joe hurt you when he…left."

She nodded, her eyes still had that sad, desolate look from before.

"And now you're afraid of putting your- your heart on the line?"

"Now you're starting to sound like I'm a suspect." She said accusingly, angrily.

He shook his head and took her hand. "I'm sorry. Look Alex, I've been there, okay? That line…it sucks."

"'Sucks'. That's a nice 'Goren' word." She said with a forgiving smile.

He chuckled. "But I'm right, aren't I?" He asked after a second.

The smile fell from her face and she nodded. "Yeah, Bobby, you're right. Are you happy?!?"

She was getting angry again.

"No. I'm not."

She frowned. "Why?"

He smiled sadly. "Because you're not."

Her breath caught in her throat. He saw her in a different light just then. Her eyes were red and rimmed with un-fallen tears and her mouth was open in a slight 'o'.

He chuckled again and raised his hand to her cheek, wiping the tears from before away with his thumb. Without hesitating, he lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her gently. "I'm not going to gloat when you're hurt."

She looked up at him from under her lashes. "You're amazing."

He shrugged.

"No, you always know what to say…and what to do."

"Come 'ere." He opened his arms and put his feet on the couch, moving her between him and the back of the couch.

"Like that." She said as she closed her eyes and leaned against his chest.

"I'll always be here, Alex. Regardless of _any _of the lines."

"Mhm, yes. There _are _other lines, aren't there?"

"Eh, what Ross doesn't know won't hurt him."

"I knew there was a reason I liked you."

* * *

**Author's Note:** Right, the end wasn't much, but I liked the rest of it. Can't blame me for the end though, I mean, it is, once again, 1 in the morning. I get most of my inspiration at that time . Review!


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